Conversations with Bibi & Alice: Has dating always been this tough or is it some-more heartless than ever?

Dating? It’s all different now. Or is it?

Single Bibi Lynch, who is now navigating a dangerous universe of complicated dating around amicable media and smartphones, shares her fear stories with married Alice Wright, who hasn’t been on a date for good over a decade.

metro illustrationsConversations with Bibi and Alice: Is attribute sex improved than sex with a new partner?

But have a horrors of dating gotten worse?

Or has it always been so hideous?

Bibi: So, Alice, we was meditative about we in a showering this morning…

Alice: How lovely!

B: Heh. Thinking about how propitious we are that we don’t have to date anymore. As my pleasing ex, G, used to say: ‘Boys and girls… It’s a f***ing nightmare.’ And, in 2017, wow he is right.

metro illustrations
(Picture: Ella Byworth for

A: True, we haven’t been on a date with a intensity partner for over 12 years now. Not certain we skip it given approbation it is a nightmare. And even some-more so today?

B: Yes. Definitely some-more so now. I, as we’ve established, am utterly a almighty singular woman, so have antiquated given 1901 ’til today.

A: You’re looking fanciful for your age.

B: Stop flirting with me. So can we share some of a horrors?

A: Do we unequivocally wish to hear this? *flinches slightly yet pulls adult a chair*

B: It will make your pleasing hair curl. But, still, saves on a demi-wave (Reader: ask your mum).

OK, one of my new ‘admirers’ incited out to be also ‘admiring’ a crony of mine. At a same time. And afterwards we found out he’d ‘admired’ another lady we know. And she told me about another.

Right now, we got to about 7 women that he ‘wooed’ on Twitter, regulating a same lines, too. Hmmm.

A: Oh my god, using Twitter as a dating app?

twitter love

B: Exactly. Now let me tell we about another.

A: Hang on, what happened with Twitter Casanova? Please tell me we all combined a Wanted Poster meme that was common widely and happily regulating his Lothario face?

B: Ha! we wish. Well, one of a women actually outed him. And, nada. There’s a uncanny ‘blindness’ on Twitter when it suits. So he’s still there.

A: Twitter is good for assembly people – yet apparently some competence use the anonymity a small too well. Just as in genuine life, gotta be wakeful we suppose. So come on, what else is function in dating land in 2017? It’s all altered given my day when it was all only fields.

B: So another offshoot up I met on Twitter now has his poetic partner as his avi. I messaged him: ‘Your girlfriend is beautiful. So since are we late-night texting me?’ we met another bloke online and he was amazing. Said he’d marry me tomorrow. He’d ‘waited his whole life for me’, apparently. He dumped me by text.

A: Goodness me, does a practical inlet of dating currently meant it’s easier to provide people distant some-more accidentally than if we knew them improved IRL?

Has dating always been this tough or is it some-more heartless than ever?

B: It’s accurately that. We don’t accommodate IRL now given we’re all too bustling looking down during a phones rather than adult and around us during intensity lovelies.

Dating now is fast-paced and harsh. It’s a sum ‘sweet shop’ mentality: there’ll always be another gob-stopper, so since settle for this one? (Sorry about ‘gob-stopper’.) That feeling – that there is a universe of people to select from – creates people unequivocally bloody mean.

A: So how do we standout and spin somebody’s ‘gobstopper’?

B: Well apparently we don’t know! And we see me some-more as a Dip Dab. And I roughly don’t wish to mount out, though. Why, ahem, hook to it? These attitudes are so cruel. we mean, ghosting. How f***ing terrible is that? So hurtful. And so disrespectful.

A: Ah ghosting – have we had experiences with that?

B: I, luckily, given my bad tortured mind would not hoop that well, have never been ghosted. But we know people who’ve antiquated someone for ages and then, poof, just gone. No explanation. Nothing. Can we suppose not removing any answers?

(Picture: Ella Byworth for

A: Again, this is an instance of how casual treatment of others has become. Dating used to feel utterly special yet a never-ending options (yes, mainly interjection to amicable media) has meant everybody feels entitled to play a margin a bit wider, a bit craftier.

But it can’t be all bad out there today? Tell me about a good dating knowledge you’ve had?

B: It. Is. All. Hideous. A crony was revelation me about his new date.

He sat in a bar, watchful for a bloke to arrive. Bloke sent a content observant he was using late yet he’d be there in 20. About 10 mins later, he sent another summary observant he was on his way. Five mins later the same. He didn’t spin up.

A: Now that’s only rude, yet we am certain this contingency have always happened? People have been stood adult for years – nonetheless mobile phones meant people feel some-more gentle doing it, like promulgation a content creates it OK.

B: And this is a worst. A partner told me about her friend. This lady had been ‘chatting’ with a male online for ages and unequivocally favourite him. They organised to accommodate and she was so excited. High hopes.

She stood outward a concluded venue and a automobile gathering adult to her with a window wound down – her date shouted, ‘You wear too most make-up’ and sped off. I wish to dump a C-bomb.

A: I indeed can’t trust it, that’s soooo mean!

Has dating always been this tough or is it some-more heartless than ever?
(Picture: Liberty Antonia Sadler for

B: But am I rose-tinting here? You must’ve had dating awfulness in a past?

A: Well we had content messaging when we was ‘out in a field’ yet thankfully no amicable media during all. No apps, nothing. But we did go to a singles’ night – we used to have those. A mixer, where we were given keys and padlocks and had to compare them adult – we did get a snog out of it.

B: Locks. Keys. Snogs. we don’t know we anymore.

A: And I’ve had that special poetic knowledge of a fanciful date, a assembly of minds, a excitement, a extraordinary night in bed – followed by a morning of contrition where he couldn’t get out of a doorway discerning enough.

But not before revelation me we was too clingy and we were going nowhere. My conduct was spinning, it was like a marriage in 24hours.

B: Oh my God. we do not like this. G was right: it’s a f***ing nightmare. Could we hoop it now, though? The heartless inlet of it?

A: No! Because now we have to send nudes before you’re even deliberate for a date. we mean, what’s that about? Talk about brutal.

At slightest we used to get bought a splash or cooking before someone got to see your pieces and bobs. Now, where’s a inducement to accommodate up, discuss and giggle and get your pack off together if you’ve already seen it all on your phone?

'My story of how my beloved common insinuate pics online'
(Picture: Liberty Antonia Sadler for

B: Yes, phones are not a friends. Although filters are. Totally going to name my pups Bits and Bobs now, though.

A: You can have that.

B: God magnify you.

A: But honestly, we wouldn’t be means to demeanour a male in a eye over a candlelit list if his dick pics were already nestling in my inbox.

B: ’Inbox’. *chokes*

A: Oh God. Laughing out loud.

B: But during slightest you’re saying Junior first? No surprises? (Assuming Junior is his.)

A: But we don’t WANT to see Junior initial – dating should be about discovery.

B: It should be about discovery. But isn’t now. All a foreplay happens online. And then…? Well if there’s a ‘fault’, you’re not perfect, it’s ‘Ta Ta’ and *blocks*

A: Aaargh, honestly no we don’t consider we could understanding with dating today.

B: Bring behind tea dances!

A: Exactly! Because the digital and practical universe has done dating more cut-throat?

B: Totally. Am now perplexing to work out who to sue? Turing? Jobs? Tim Berners-Lee? Although if any of them wish to accommodate up. No, I’m saving myself for you.

A: DM me.

MORE: Conversations with Bibi Alice: Should weddings be banned?

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Posted by on May 17 2017. Filed under Sex. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry

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